To Be Treated

You look trapped in your pictures,

You cannot exceed the frame,

He grips your side with a smirk,

You look down smiling at the dirt,

Let’s be honest, it’s obvious you’re hurt,

It’s obvious that what goes on at home must not be seen at church,

He’s obviously abusive,

And there’s a reason why he wants to keep your relationship completely exclusive.

 

You have like 2 friends, your two older sisters,

And when you need something, both of their responses couldn’t be swifter,

But you never say you need anything,

Even though you’re hungry for validation,

You need no other external influence to bring you to the realization-,

That his love is blisters,

He gets jealous when you talk to men at work…

 

Transactional communication coated with copious aggression,

He always has to teach you something to make sure you learn your lesson,

At least three punches a night,

Not a fight,

Because you never hit back,

You just wait for him to finish and you apologize for the slack,

Your face is perfect,

Too perfect,

Mounds of makeup,

Smile is overexerted.

Stories you gotta make up,

Wearing foundation at the gym,

A relationship polluted with glum and grim-

Representations of control,

The society advises you to step off the battlefield before the battlefield takes its irreparable toll,

You’re a glutton for pain, so of course you’ll stay,

He’ll eventually snap one day,

And crush your head on the wall,

Your sisters would be at your funeral crying at your call-

To not speak to your family about the throes of your fall,

He would run away…well crawl-

Into a hole to evade the police,

Your body would be left on the bloody floor with your name still on the lease,

Just because no one taught you how men should treat.

 

Plague

I had a dream that I lost her,

The light left and I was forced to rekindle my flame in this new darkness,

I had a dream that I saw her, bewildered and heartless,

We had to be stuck in the same cage,

Because I could feel her breath on my shoulder,

The breath began to go colder and her eyes began to glow bright red,

She was trying to wake the dead-

Feeling of abandonment but bred injustice instead,

She was between two nexuses I didn’t care about,

I began to shout-

In the dark,

Trying to keep my spark,

From being consumed by her stark-

Attempts to swallow me whole.

 

I woke up,

To the bells of my alarm clock,

Completely sweaty, completely still in shock,

I could not believe,

That another person convinced me I didn’t need to breath,

That another person made my wants feel like my needs,

I couldn’t believe,

That I would be force-fed an understanding I simply could not conceive,

A plight of reality of knowledge,

A pain held on my ribs,

I got up to work…

Getting dressed with my eyes closed…

 

Lice

I used to get beaten in my sleep from emotional dreams,

I would jolt up in cold turmoil and try to rock myself back to sleep.

 

I was never afraid to wet the bed with the tears taken from me,

Giving substance to the memories of unsightly abuse,

My eyes had no other use,

But to give life to my imagination of cutting my oppressor into two,

Or three,

I was never ever afraid to wet the bed…with the tears that were taken from me.

 

Years would pass,

I would…I would laugh,

The memories would last,

I could not would not forget,

There was no space for positivity to fit,

Space-less pieces of meat and shit,

Forced into a giant head,

Tiny lice’s proclivities to my bed…

 

 

Once the decade touched,

I wanted to move, but too much,

I wanted to get better,

I wanted to change the proverbial mental weather,

That I’ve keep for years,

That I kept tied intimately with my fears,

I hated their stain,

I could see it every time I experienced pain,

I wanted to kill everything I touched,

I wanted to improve, but not too much,

I couldn’t lose the person I thought I found,

In the mirror of yesterday staying into the presently unsound,

I wanted to win,

So…I did.

 

 

 

2020

They enthused about the idea of massive genocide,

Slamming their broken bottoms of their flaming forks into the ground,

They disowned the colored women they once sleep beside,

Shortly after those same women tried to run aww and were chased and captured by hounds.

 

Year 2020, the black no longer the minority,

The pail ones feel the falling of their economic superiority,

Convinced that us blacks intended to start this fire rekindled for centuries,

Convinced we were not meant to integrate, that we worn enemies.

 

The phobias spill from their chests and cover the streets,

The parts not covered by their stomping feet

Their attempts to enervate-

The base of society –

Further snapped in two,

Head honcho gringo screaming provocations to the foolish folk,

The community crashed, the tension broke,

Law enforcement struggling to cradle the clashing clans,

Action on one, response on the other hand.

 

This is the future of the dramatic few,

Wanting nothing but continued violence and historic residue,

To drench the streets.

 

There are us, the unaffected ones,

 

 

 

 

Clinging to the reality of the issue,

It only exists internally, bound to our ribs,

Hatred actually has nothing to give-

But dissension and upheaval crushing the sorrowful communities zeal to love,

 

So I chose, to not talk about racism and keep it trapped inside those rotting corpses until it starkly affects my surrounding brethren,

I am not oppressed.

Delon

She got into a minivan,

He drove off, like fast,

She looked at a million mini strands-

Of browned stained grass,

The outsiders stared into the van-

With dark tinted glass,

The little lady loosens laces-

Of her stained soccer shoes,

Ol’ Little lady making faces at-

Her trained boxer bruised,

She squeals with her tongue,

He slams on brakes,

Her body goes numb,

She jumps quick as she wakes,

Outside a dumpster on Delon,

She stands and her waist,

Drenched in dried white from what he’s done,

She searches around this place,

Screaming loudly with half lung…

I can feel the tension still stagnate in my legs,

I can still see the imprint of where the seat bit her head,

I can smell the pain on the top of her breath,

I call still feel vibrations as she dances near death,

I reach high into the sky parked beside the blue van,

Grabbing shards of myself to build a new man,

I stare at God for minutes on end,

He stares back at me casting consequence to sin.

The sirens are screaming the sirens are screaming,

The day has came down, the night now has meaning,

I turn to my right and see white red lights,

The cop sprung out of his vehicle and read me my rights,

I pray in silence in hope that God might,

Give me a reason to take my own life.

The Wolf

He’s going to try his old methods,

To obfuscate the throng of rural people in order to capitalize on their idiocy,

He’s present himself “holy than thou” to make them believe that they’re protected,

From the ones insidiously-

Supplying moxy to the wretched.

He’ll speak in riddles,

They’ll hang to his cloak,

The attendance will the triple,

The governed once believed it a joke,

His discourses are brittle-

As he forces his hearers to choke…

He’s a monster,

In warming mantles,

They invite his new blight that gives life to parasites,

Granting poison via tongues,

And confusion to the young,

Good peace forever none,

Speak now forever done,

Promise the damaged forever fun,

In lands of nights and never suns,

The poor-man’s intrigue,

Latching tightly to the folly,

Music to the ears,

And verve to the body.

Sound

The champion ghost,
Up close,
I couldn’t see her,
She thirsted,
I refused to feed her.

I extended my hand through her hollow chest,
The moisture of her atmosphere stung at best,
The old poison I couldn’t breath,
Produced from the heart I wouldn’t feed,
Produced from the heart I often need,
To replenish my daily desire to grieve,
Her condition from my own inaction,
I keep reaching inside her spirit to grab a reaction,
She wouldn’t move,
I searched for her better,
She wouldn’t improve,
Petrified just stand and stare,
And focus on how we’re getting each other no where.

I recessed, and matched her frequency,
I noticed she hasn’t been saying much recently,
I figured the cat had her tongue,
Or I’ve bent her energy until she had none,
I waited,
And watched-
A word trickle down her lip, and stopped,
Before it hit,
The ground,
The awful sound,
Of shattered speech,
Right by her feet,
It harmed my ears,
It harmed the peace,
Unquiet decrease-
Of her and me,
Day in day out,
I need to shout,
She’d break like glass,
She takes a gasp,
Of air at last,
The storm has passed,
The awful point,
The awful past…
Finally…sound.